RockStarPeach

Okay, we're really coming up on the end here. It looks like 23 chapters, plus an epilogue. This is a very Wesley/Giles chapter. They had some shit to work through :)

Title: Arrangement

Characters/Pairings: Giles/Lindsey, Lindsey/Spike, Giles/Wes, Giles/others, other slight pairings

Rating: Adult

Summary: Giles is a ridiculously unfaithful wealthy older man, keeping Lindsey around for pleasure and company, but when someone else catches Lindsey’s eye, he realises he wants more out of a relationship. Giles has sex with just about everyone. Spike tries to. Wes gets in over his head.

Banner by angelstoy Thanks so much, honey!! *hugs*

Previous Chapters

Chapter 21

A week passed.

Rupert fucked Wesley every single day, and every day Rupert didn’t let Wesley come, stopped him before he got the chance, spewing his own release inside the younger man’s arse, on his face, his chest, his back.

Rupert hadn’t been lying when he’d told Wesley he didn’t like this. He’d absolutely be having a much better time if his partner was getting off as well, but he had a lesson to get across, so that was out of the question. Plus, he was pissed off.

And yes, he was aware he was acting stupidly, essentially throwing a tantrum, but he’d just lost Lindsey, and he was probably overcompensating for that. He’d be damned if he was going to let Wesley entertain the notion that his transgressions would be easily forgotten.

The first couple of times, Wesley hadn’t known what Rupert was doing, had been fooled, had expected orgasm to come from their encounters, just as it had every time prior to his being caught with Lindsey. But he soon learned.

And the third time, he hadn’t bothered trying to come. In fact, he’d tried not to, knowing that he wouldn’t be allowed, and not wanting to get too aroused, not wanting to get his hopes up. But of course Rupert hadn’t made it that easy on him, had made sure he got hard, had made sure to drive him to the edge, using so much care, paying so much attention, touching in all the little ways he’d learned over the months to make him crazy with lust, need.

By the fifth time, Wesley hadn’t bothered fighting. He just let his body respond as it wanted, as Rupert wanted, and when his orgasm was once again denied, he only responded with a tiny sigh of disappointment, and rolled over to try to find sleep.

Rupert hated himself a little.

And he missed Lindsey.

But, Rupert just couldn’t give Lindsey what he needed, and he knew it was best for both of them that he let him go. Even if the younger man’s heart had made a terrible choice for love this time around, when he got over Rupert, Rupert knew that could and would find the kind of happiness he needed with someone else.

And Rupert thought he could be happy with Wesley, too, once he’d gotten over Lindsey. He wasn’t foolish enough to think that he and Wesley had any long term potential. He didn’t with most people. They always said they were okay with how things were, and most of them actually meant it, at least at first. But inevitably they’d always either gotten bored, Rupert had gotten bored, or they’d gotten attached. He could see it already in Wesley, had seen in people before. Lindsey wasn’t the first of his… friends… to fall in love with him, but he’d never been willing to give any of them more. Lindsey was the closest he’d come to wanting to, and he’d ended up getting hurt.

Wesley had been twitchy about this arrangement from the start, and only seemed to be getting more so. Not that Rupert had given him much of any kind of reason to feel comfortable about what they had. He’d been an arse.

But until Wesley got sick of him, and if Rupert could manage to stop treating him so terribly insensitively, he thought they’d be good together. At the very least, having Wesley around would make the transition to a life without Lindsey a little easier.

Outside of the bedroom though, this past week, things seemed to have been alright between himself and Wesley.

Of course, Wesley was at work all day, and Rupert had spent most of his afternoons at the company, getting fucked into the desk, the wall, the carpet, by Ethan, but the times when they were both home, before they went to bed, things were good.

In the past five years Rupert thought that he might have had sex with Ethan a dozen times, and at least half of those had been since he’d first caught Lindsey with Spike. It just wasn’t something they had been indulging in lately, even when they were alone together for some reason, drunk or bored or angry with each other.

He hadn’t really thought about it much, but he supposed that with Lindsey around, he just hadn’t been all that interested.

But now Rupert felt as though he needed it. Ethan was just about the only one that Rupert ever let top him, and perhaps it was that that he needed. He certainly couldn’t imagine any other reason for wanting to spend so much time with the irritating berk.

Ethan offered to bottom every time they were together, painted pretty pictures for Rupert with his words about what they’d look like together, how it would feel with Rupert buried deep inside him over the desk, or him sitting on Rupert’s lap on the sinfully plush leather desk chair. Rupert suspected it was only because he would usually decline the offer.

This week he’d taken him up on it, once, but all the other times he’d let Ethan take him, revelling in the feeling of getting fucked, of not having to play any games, keep up any appearances. It was too much sometimes, always being the one in control, making the rules, and when he was with Ethan, especially when he gave up control, it was easy. It was just about the two of them finding a temporary pleasure in each other’s bodies. They were beyond games, the two of them.

They were equals, in whatever sort of bizarre, sporadic friendship they enjoyed, and neither of them had any desire to change that. They weren’t trying to impress, manipulate, control. It was freeing.

And every day after he was done at the office, he’d go home. Wesley would either be there, or be home shortly, and they’d smile at each other, kiss, hug, Rupert would run his fingers through Wesley’s hair and tell him how very beautiful he was, and they’d sit down to supper together, have a pleasant meal, and pleasant conversation.

After that they would sit together, have a drink, play cards, watch television. Something. Everything. Things that normal couples did at the end of every day. And both of them, for a little while, would forget that they weren’t just a normal couple. It was nice.

And then they would go to bed, and it would hit Rupert, hard, that Lindsey wasn’t in his bed anymore, not in any bed he planned on visiting ever again. And even though he knew Wesley wasn’t the reason for that, he couldn’t help but take it out on him, again and again. Because Wesley was there. And Wesley had also betrayed him. He didn’t think he could stand to go through all this again, so Wesley needed to understand the seriousness of his rules.

Every day was the same.

Expect the seventh day.

***

Rupert got home later than usual that night, having actually stuck around for a business meeting after seeing Ethan. There had been no other reason for it really, than to show his face, which he liked to do once in a while, just to remind people that it was still his company. He had no idea what was said, nor did he care, but everyone was on their best behaviour, regardless. They tended to get like that when the boss was around.

It wasn’t too late, really. Not even past seven when he got back to the apartment, expecting a quiet, normal evening, and supper waiting on him. He stopped by the guest washroom near the front hall to wash up before going into the kitchen, where he found Wesley, sitting quietly at the table, and Simon, having started to serve up supper as soon as he heard Rupert come in.

“Good evening,” he said, to both of them, and neither of them answered, just looked at him briefly, before Simon brought two full plates to the set table, putting them down between glasses filled with water and wine, and a basket of freshly made bread.

Rupert sat down at his place next to Wesley and Simon nodded, left without a word, the front door closing quietly behind him.

Rupert frowned. Simon wasn’t exactly the talkative type, but he was usually at least polite. It was probably nothing, Rupert thought, and turned to Wesley, smiling, grabbing his wine glass intending to share a drink with his lover.

But as he turned, he noticed something. Wesley’s suitcase. Sitting next to the kitchen wall, looking ominous, yet inconspicuous, if something could be both. Rupert knew what it meant. He knew this would happen, but he’d hoped it would happen later. It seemed as if he’d run out of time. He should have treated the boy much better.

Rupert tried to keep his movement fluid, tried not to let the sight throw him, although honestly, it did. He lifted his wine glass, tilting it toward Wesley before taking a rather large sip.

“I see you’ve packed again,” he said, making his best effort to keep his voice level.

Wesley nodded. “I’ve leaving,” he told him, and he really meant it. He loved Rupert. He honestly loved him, and wanted nothing more than for the two of them to be together, but he’d been kidding himself if he ever thought that it was a possibility. Even if Rupert wasn’t hung up on another man, he’d never be able to return Wesley’s feelings. It was a painful realisation, but one he should have come to long ago.

This whole ‘being Rupert’s bitch’ set-up that he had agreed to was all he could ever hope for. He’d thought that it was just a phase they needed to work through together, and eventually the older man would allow things to change, to let Wesley in, to let them be more. But that wasn’t going to happen, he’d finally realised, and Wesley couldn’t deal with this. Not anymore.

“Don’t try to stop me this time,” Wesley said, sounding as stern as he was able in Rupert’s presence. If he did, Wesley would just give in again, and he really, really didn’t want that. Shit, he really wished that he didn’t feel so strongly for this stupid son of a bitch.

“I wasn’t going to,” Rupert assured him, and put his glass down, picking up his fork, preparing to dig into his supper.

Wesley couldn’t stop the slightly disappointed pout that crossed his face at hearing that. It didn’t make sense, he was aware of that, but despite him not wanting Rupert to ask him to stay, he wanted Rupert to want him to stay. He wanted some sort of hint that he’d meant something to this man, and that he’d be missed. He supposed he was just kidding himself, even thinking that might be true.

”You’re right to leave,” Rupert continued, after swallowing down a bite. He knew this was a difficult decision for Wesley, and he wanted to make it as easy as possible. It was clearly what Wesley needed, and Rupert was going to let him have it, whatever selfish motivation he harboured for wanting to keep Wesley with him.

It hurt to know that he was leaving, an annoying tickle in his stomach that Rupert tried to settle with another bite of food, and the unpleasant tightness that Rupert associated with being alone tugged at his chest.

No matter. He had clearly held onto Lindsey much too long, making the young man suffer even before he knew he was, and he didn’t want to make that mistake with Wesley. He would let him go, because Wesley needed it, and Rupert would find someone else quickly enough. If he wanted someone else.

He wasn’t entirely sure that he did.

He’d fallen fairly hard for Lindsey, and he could have done so for Wesley as well, given the chance. He wasn’t sure that anyone else would be good enough, wasn’t even sure that this type of relationship, the type that he’d made a point of forging with anyone that he held even a glimmer of interest for in the last ten years, since Jenny had left him, however unwillingly, was even going to make him happy anymore.

Nobody could be what Lindsey was to him, but there was no sense looking back now. Things were as they were, and he didn’t have much choice but to move forward. With someone else, or on his own, he knew it ultimately wouldn’t make much difference.

“I’ve been terribly unfair to you.” It seemed woefully inadequate, but any sharing of feelings at this point would probably only bring them closer, and that wasn’t what Rupert wanted. Wasn’t what Wesley wanted, either.

Wesley nodded, trying to bite back his feelings, trying to swallow around tears of hurt, of rejection that he would never allow to fall. The look in Rupert’s eyes just now told him that he’d been very right in his decision to end things, and the reason for that decision.

Rupert, no matter how much he enjoyed Wesley’s company, or how much he genuinely liked him, was attracted to him, wanted him to be something he couldn’t. Lindsey. After the older man had stopped seeing his ex-lover, Wesley thought things would get better, that Rupert would forget about him, and give Wesley a fair shot, but that obviously hadn’t happened. And Rupert’s casual acceptance of his going only added credence to his thoughts.

“You miss him,” Wesley said, not a question, and not elaborating on who he meant by ‘him’. He wasn’t really expecting an answer, and started down at his plate, wondering if he should bother eating before he left. He might as well, since he had no idea where he was going, and no idea what he’d have to eat when he got there.

“That’s none of your business,” Rupert said, surprising Wesley by even bothering to respond.

Wesley dropped his fork, rethinking his plan to eat. He’d probably only throw it up, anyway. “Do I mean anything to you at all?” he asked. “I mean, besides a guaranteed hole to shove your cock in?”

Rupert stilled his own fork, halfway to his mouth, and retuned it to his plate, looking hard at Wesley and raising a chastising eyebrow. He’d had just about enough of that sort of attitude.

“What?” Wesley asked, getting angry now, as well as hurt. “Is that look supposed to shut me up? Supposed to make me look down and apologise, and put me back in line? I’m not Lindsey. Or any of the other little pretty boys that have filled the space next to you in your bed. And I’m sick of doing as you say, simply because you say it.”

Wesley paused to take a deep breath, and while he was at it, a deep swig from his glass of wine, because damn, Rupert was still looking at him like he was some kind of misbehaving teenager, and Rupert was just watching the show with mild amusement until Wesley was finished, so that he could punish him for his outburst.

“Now answer me,” he demanded, not much heat behind his words, but since he was leaving anyway, he hoped that Rupert would answer, and not try to pull any of that ‘I’m the boss’ crap on him that he just knew the older man was thinking about. “Do I mean anything to you?”

Rupert picked up easily on the desperation in Wesley’s voice. Not desperation to stay, to be with Rupert, but he was clearly desperate. He wanted Rupert to answer in the affirmative, to confess to some great hidden feelings, to lend some validity to his time in Rupert’s life, and make himself feel a little less foolish for getting as invested as he had.

Rupert was usually a very honest person, and he knew he hadn’t been exceedingly so with Wesley so far. Now was as good a time as any to change that. The only chance he had, really. He sat back in his chair and folded his hands over each other on the table in front of him, next to his supper plate.

“Yes,” he answered simply, and for several seconds it appeared that was all he was going to say, but eventually he continued. “You mean a great deal to me, Wesley. I enjoy your company, enjoy having you around. For more than just sex, though that is my primary interest. I’d never have loved you, though, I don’t think that’s much of a secret. That was never what this was about. But I do… feel something. You mean something.”

Wesley’s face fell for the second time in just a few minutes at hearing that Rupert could never have loved him, but he covered quickly. Rupert was right, it hadn’t been much of a secret. It just hurt to hear it out loud.

“And yes,” Rupert said, quieter this time, and Wesley looked at him questioningly. “I miss him.”

“Well then bloody well wise up and tell him that!” Wesley snapped. It wasn’t that he was particularly eager to see Rupert make up with Lindsey, but they obviously cared a great deal for each other, and it just didn’t make sense that they wouldn’t be together.

In Wesley’s mind, if you loved someone who loved you back, you told them so. You stayed with them, and told them so, every day.

Rupert smiled sadly at him and moved one of his hands, barely bushing it against Wesley’s, but when the young man jerked his hand back, Rupert placed his own back on the table. “It’s not that easy. I know you think that I have very strong feelings for him, and you’re right. At least in part. I don’t love him, Wesley.”

Wesley opened his mouth to protest, not believing that for a second, but Rupert put his hand up, stopping him from commenting. He was pretty damn sure that Rupert did in fact love Lindsey, no matter how he’d behaved, or what he was saying at the moment, but his own stubborn pride had kept him from saying so, had kept him from developing any kind of real relationship with the other man. Or with Wesley, for that matter.

“I don’t love him,” Rupert said again, not quite understanding why it was he was sharing this with Wesley. Perhaps he felt he owed him the explanation after the way he’d treated him since they’d gotten together. “Not like he needs me to. But you’re right, I do care for him, very much. And yes, I’m having a hard time letting go.”

“Then don’t, you damn fool!” Wesley almost shouted, finding that the more Rupert denied his feelings for Lindsey, the more Wesley believed in them. It was just so infuriating! A part of him, a very large part, wanted nothing more than for Rupert and Lindsey to never see each other again, to be lonely and miserable, because Wesley had a feeling that’s how he was going to be for a while, and it wasn’t fair for him to be the only one who was miserable when absolutely none of this was his fault. Mostly.

But he did truly love Rupert, truly wanted to see him happy, and in the spirit of truth, he had to admit that he didn’t find Lindsey as offensive as he would have liked. And he did feel sorry for him. They both deserved happiness, he thought.

“And you’d better stop treating him like a piece of furniture, like you... like you treated me,” he added, looking down briefly. “Because he’s a person, and he loves you, and he deserves better than that! He wants to be loved, for God’s sake, wants to be your equal. Not something that you use for your own convenience. Is that really too much to ask?”

“I know very well what he wants, Wesley. That’s why I left him.” It was the first time he’d said that; that he’d been the one to leave Lindsey. He’d always blamed it on the other man, said that it was his choice, because of his fooling around, but he’d always known it was a lie. And so did Wesley, so there was no point trying to say different.

“You’ll wind up with no-one,” Wesley said sternly, eyes narrowing, “if you don’t seriously change some of your ways, Rupert.”

“I thought I had you,” Rupert said, and offered an awkward half smile.

Wesley sighed, twirled his wine glass around by the stem. “Honestly, I could have handled your occasional dalliances, if I knew I was the one you truly wanted. Alright,” he amended at Rupert’s slightly sceptical look. “I could have handled it for longer that this, any way. But I’m not. The one you truly want.”

Lindsey had said that to him, and he’d ended up punching the man, but he knew, probably even then, that it was truth. He supposed he’d always known it.

“I’m…” Rupert started, stopped, barked out a sharp laugh, took a drink of his water and started again. “I’m sorry, Wesley. You have no idea how sorry. And I know I’ve told you that before, I’ve even meant it before, but I suppose I was just to preoccupied with my own agenda to think about how what I did affected you.”

“Rupert, this isn’t…” Wesley started, wanting to say that he wasn’t looking for an apology. It was too late for that, and he really didn’t want Rupert to say anything that might take away some of his anger, make him start to fall all over again for Rupert’s seductiveness, but again, Rupert stopped him talking with just a look. Damn.

“I’ve been particularly hard on you, Wesley. On Lindsey as well, but… well, there’s a bit of a history there, and Lindsey knows me a sight better than you do, knows how I am when… well. Right. The fact is, I acted in ways I normally wouldn’t, and it was unfair.”

Oh, he’d always controlled people with his money, his charm, used them both mercilessly to get his way. Got off harder when someone stayed with him because they needed him, because his control was absolute, then. But he’d always made his motivations clear to people, never led them on. When they fell for him, and they usually did, Rupert had always warned them not to, and only felt the tiniest bit bad when he’d sent them away.

And he’d never been faithful, not in a long time anyway, not since Jenny, but he’d always been very upfront about that, never lied. He hadn’t really cared very much for what his lovers thought of things, but he’d never been particularly cruel, not in his intentions or actions. Not until Lindsey’s feelings for him had become real, and he hadn’t known what to do about it but drive him away, and take the loss out on a very sweet, very caring, very trusting young man.

Perhaps he’d take a break from this, Rupert thought. Take a break from being involved, because he really didn’t deserve to have anyone at the moment. Not until he’d sorted himself out. He hated the way he’d treated Wesley. He wouldn’t go so far as to say the past few months had been out of character for him; he’d been himself, but… more.

And when he found someone else, he wanted to be able to start clean, without this mess hanging over his head.

“Oh,” Wesley said, sarcasm evident in just the one word. “So you don’t normally keep people around as fuck dolls, abusing them, emotionally and physically, while you continue to chase around ‘the one that got away’?”

“Wesley,” Rupert said, his tone apologetic, and yet somehow exasperated. “Enough. I know I treated you wrongly, and I wish things could have been different between us. But this is what we got. And I had fun, most of the time. Didn’t you?”

Wesley tried to scowl, but Rupert’s soft look, gentle grin, and those damn fingers of his again, creeping toward him, across his hand, up his arm, turned his look into something much less harsh. He was such a complete and utter pussy. Give him a little bit of positive attention and he crumpled.

“I should go,” he said, but he didn’t make any move to stand, just turned his arm over so that Rupert’s fingers traced up and down the inside of his arm, from wrist to elbow.

“I wish you wouldn’t,” Rupert said, knowing it was what Wesley needed to hear, and knowing that it wouldn’t change anything. He wouldn’t have said it if he thought it would.

“So do I,” Wesley whispered back, closing his eyes and leaning closer to Rupert. He felt the older man move closer, felt the heat radiate off him and against his own face, his neck. He parted his lips just slightly, taking a breath, running his tongue across to moisten them, and then whatever he had felt was gone.

He opened his eyes again and Rupert was sitting in his chair, had taken his hand back so that he wasn’t touching Wesley, wasn’t invading his personal space the way they both wanted him to be. Wesley let out a shaky breath and made to stand, thinking he’d been dismissed, and he wasn’t even going to get the goodbye kiss he’d only just now realised that he wanted so badly.

“Tomorrow,” Rupert said, trying to give Wesley enough space to make his own decision on this. Lord knew the young man was easy enough for Rupert to manipulate, but he didn’t want to right now. He was leaving. That was for the best, and really, neither of them wanted his mind to change. But Rupert wanted to have one more night with him. One more night to be with him, now that he wasn’t just thinking of him as Lindsey’s substitute, to show him what he was worth, all on his own.

But he wanted Wesley to make a clear-headed decision about it, so he had backed off, given him physical space when he’d asked.

“I’m sorry?” Wesley said, blinking, confused. “What about tomorrow.”

“Leave,” Rupert told him, unable to keep his hand from moving closer again, this time placing it on Wesley thigh. So much for giving him space. Rupert was just so used to using his wiles to get people to capitulate that he really couldn’t help himself. “But leave tomorrow. Stay with me tonight. Just one more night.”

“I…” Wesley said, jerking his leg away, but then quickly relaxing it back into Rupert’s touch. He laughed. Actually laughed, at Rupert for being so utterly predictable, at himself for being equally so, at them both for not just being able to let this go, now.

But one night couldn’t possibly hurt anything, wouldn’t change any minds, and could probably only give them both some closure on this non-relationship, give them both one more pleasant memory to take away from the experience.

“Yes, alright,” he agreed, still smiling, standing now, and holding out his hand for the older man to take.

When he felt Rupert’s palm against his own, when he received an answering smile from Rupert, and watched him stand as well, he leaned forward and placed his lips to Rupert’s neck, kissing gently before opening his mouth and biting down, playfully.

“I’ll leave tomorrow,” he said, and started to walk backwards, toward the bedroom, pulling Rupert along with him.

TBC